before i step back into school tomorrow and start lessons, i'm gonna promise myself that i'll smile and keep smiling!:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):) no matter how hard. even when my eyes are brimming with tears.

just got off the phone with vathsala and i sort of realise how im affecting other ppl. as in, the tension. i m just too stressed up. is there a fixed amt of stress that anyone can handle? i guess not. its how we handle them and whether we want to or not. if we decide to take it then we should be responsible for it. the thing is, mayb i take too much. that's y its 6 days into the new year and i m still learning how to let go. when letting go is so hard.

i believe that if i try, i can. isnt it? we're all born believing. a man bears beliefs, as a tree bears apples. so yeah. there it goes. its like, aerodynamically, a bumblebee isnt supposed to fly. but the bumblebee doesnt know so it continues to fly anyway. and that's my point. sometimes, ignorance is BLISS.

this is it. i will get it right. make it right. and do it right. I BELIEVE.

im going back to the start.